The Cuban Experience

It's so hard to describe to those who haven't had it. I love my family. They are so diverse. There's MIL, she is the sweetest little wisp of a woman, very set in her life. She is protective of her children and it is obvious that she loves all of us very much. John is her baby. He doesn't like it when I call him a "Momma's boy" but when he's with his family, that's exactly what he is. Not in the sense that he is clingy or anything like that, he's just the youngest, and she loves him. My Brother-in-law is oldest, he is the one that takes care of his parents, goes to their home and helps get the bills paid, home maintainance, etc. Now he'll have a little more responsibility with his Father gone. My sister-in-law is a busy body... she is always doing something. Cooking, or cleaning, or something. Cooking, is a whooole other story. Wow... let me just say that you haven't experienced good Cuban cooking until you have eaten with my family. Of course, I have tried to learn to cook like them, I have a couple of things that I can make pretty closely to the way they do, but I'll never cook as well as either of them. Shhhh... don't tell them, I wouldn't want them to get a big head. hehe

Then, there are the nephews. Three "boys". The oldest works for the government. He has a daughter who lives in another part of the country with her Mom, but he does what he can to stay active in her life. He is very smart and protective of his family. He is more like John's younger brother, they are only 11 years apart. His girlfriend is so sweet, I just got to meet her during this trip, she listened to me babble at the visitation, she is one of the few that speaks English. The middle son has had a rough time of it. He is doing very well now though, and has settled into life as a husband and father, his son is 6. BIL & SIL love their grandchildren. The youngest is heading to college, to the delight of his family. He is married now too. His wife is very sweet as well. All of the "boys" have grown up before my eyes. We were talking about when I came to the family, the boys were so young. I'm so proud of what they have become. I hope that they are all able to carry on the Cuban ttaditions that they have grown up with. I would hate to think of that fading away as the older generation passes.

There are many many many cousins, and aunts, and uncles. I can never keep them all straight. I think John has a hard time too. hehe

Our little part of Miami is mixed with lots and lots of Spanish, with some English speckled here and there. I spend a lot of time saying "What?" and "Huh?". My MIL & FIL only speak Spanish, but they do understand English. Everyone else speaks both. I don't speak Spanish. MIL & I have that in common, she is uncomfortable speaking English, but understands quiet a bit, vice versa for me. I understand quite a bit but am so uncomfortable speaking it.

Early in our relationship and marriage I was so uncomfortable, and felt so out of place, NOT because of anything they did, or didn't do, they are so accepting(although, I bet they wonder where John found me! hehe). It's only as the years have gone by that I have realized that. I guess it's true, we do get smarter as we get older, even if our children don't believe that.

This weekend has been so difficult. It is so hard to see my husband in such pain. Having just experienced it myself, I know how hard it is. It's so difficult to see those that we love grieving. As difficult as it has been, I wouldn't have wanted to be anywhere else. We don't get to see everyone often enough.

My nephew is getting ready to leave, and said "See you at the next funeral". I wish it wasn't true, but unfortunately it might be. I hope though that we'll see them sooner, to introduce our new son to them.

I am thankful for my family. I am thankful for who they are. I'm thankful for what they have given me in my husband. I am thankful for letting me be a part of their lives.

Life will change now without my Father-in-law. He will be sorely missed, just like my own Dad is. I know though, that one thing will remain the same, we'll always be family.